Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Letting go is one of the hardest ordeals for many of us, especially me. Forget whether letting go is for the good or bad, just the thought of not having "that" as a part of your life anymore, is a heavy feeling. Whether that "That" is smses in the inbox of an old phone you dont want to throw, or telephone numbers of people you havent called in the past 3 years that you dont want to delete, or an employee you must fire but dont find the heart to, or the abusive partner that you must dump but dont have the courage to, or the mundane job that kills your soul but you dont have the confidence to find a new one. I dont know what the attachment to the dead and useless is, but it is pretty real to cause us pain.
I do firewalks and where I encourage people to confront their fears or things that they feel will deliver them pain. The magical part is when you confront your fears and pain, it miraculously transforms into fun and pleasure.
I tried this with my phone. I have over 4000 sms in my old phone, which I absolutely will not get rid off because I may "need" to refer to those messages. I realised after one month that I had not once refered to my old phone. So in 30 days I have not "needed" something I have considered so important.
A friend of mine who is the M.D. of a company wanted to fire one of her employees, but she feared the "loss" it would create in her organisation. Then one day, the employee resigned and left. Within 3 weeks they found a replacement and there was no real "loss" as my friend had anticipated.
I am led to consider a different perspective. We give too much importance to things around us. We get attached to people, things, places, weather, technology to the point that we interconnect our dependance on them completely that we sometimes forget the power of our own spirit to re-create and move on to higher grounds.
I have begun to consider that life is a journey and people, places, things will not stay in our lives forever. Some will stay longer than others and eventually all will go. So if i can treat people and things with respect and dignity in experiening them while they touch my life and also in letting them go, I will always be connected to my self, which IS the real connection.
When you let go with grace and allow the person or thing their freedom towards their journey, you will never lose them, they will always visit you back. It is when you want to own anothers time and space that you restrict them enough to move away and never return. Letting go is a virtue of allowing.... allowing others a right to their own journey, freedom and learning.
I feel the journey of connection is inward not outward. As long as that connection is strong, letting in and letting go would be an attitude of service rather than possession.
Love always, Priya