Sunday, June 17, 2007
How to get an Agreement
I was sitting with some friends at a social get together and there was one guy who was being Mr. Know It All. He seemed to have an answer for everything. And even if it seemed like he didnt know the answer, he would get into an argument and with a twist of words get away with it.
I found it rather annoying. How do you get a person who argues a lot, into agreement with you ? Thats an art and before you go out and try out the formula I am about to share with you, I suggest you practice :O)
Here is what you need to do, you need to get the person to agree with you six times, before you hit on the real agenda. For example, I wanted to get an agreement on "my" version of the theory of evolution. And I knew Mr. Know It All would butt in and argue on the subject, even if everyone else on the table agreed. So I asked him six questions to get his agreement.
1. "Would you agree that monkeys and apes evolved into human beings ?" "Yes," he said.
2. "Its the oldest theory of evolution, right ?" "Yes," he agreed matter of factly.
3. "This was almost several thousand years ago, maybe a million years ago, wasnt it ?" "Yes," he agreed.
4. "Did you say, you live in L.A ?" I asked totally out of context to the topic, "Yes," he said.
5. "Ah thats a five hour flight away from New York, right ?" "Yes", he said innocently, and unaware of my move.
6. "Oh Charles Darwin is the one who came up with this theory of evolution. Isnt it ?" I continued. "Yes," he agreed.
The answer to all the questions was a logical yes, and thats when I made the move for the kill, "Would you agree that the theory of evolution is incomplete and there are parts that dont make sense," "Yes," he said impulsively. Hurray, I had an agreement.
I then carried on discussing with my friends without him poking his argumentive nose.
This simple formula has many applications. You can get an agreement on professional and personal issues and avoid unnecessary arguments and resistance. All you need to do is get an agreement six times, any question is ok, as long the answer is "yes". I suggest you try it, and experience the magic.